The pursuit of wealth is one of the greatest illusions of our time.  We think we will be wealthy when we come to a place in our lives when we can do whatever we want with money.  One might imagine this to be the freedom illustrated by the phrase “financial peace”.  Wealth, however, will never be attained if it is defined as getting everything you want, because when you get what you want, you will just want more.  While money can fulfill needs (and thus provide fulfillment) money can never buy happiness.  I believe a person will only be able to consider themselves wealthy when they are satisfied with what they have today.

The apostle Paul writes:

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. (Philippians 4:12 NIV)

Observations about contentment:

1. Contentment is learned and thus contentment is process.  Are you becoming content?
2. When you are content, when circumstances change you do not.
3. Both the well fed and hungry are susceptible to a lack of contentment.

Here are some stats from the book Your Money and Your Brain by Jason Zweig

A survey of 800 people with a net worth of at least $500,000 found that 19% of them agreed with the statement, “Having enough money is a constant worry in my life.”  But among those who are worth at least $10 million, 33% felt that way.

I love the following quote from philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer

Wealth is “like seawater: the more you drink, the thirstier you become.”

As a result of these and similar surveys and my own personal experience, here is what I believe wealth is:

Wealth is a decision fostered by an attitude of self-control.  Wealth is experienced when a person has the ability to be content with God’s blessings.

If you are looking for an external measurement for wealth it will never come.

Wealth requires looking beyond the bank account.

The wealth we experience on this earth is about so much more than money.  If you are just trying to build wealth like crazy, you will never get enough.  If you are defining wealth in terms of acquisition of currency, it will be so hard to ever feel satisfied.  Each day take time look around and see your loved ones so you can be reminded of how blessed you are.

Wealth is the ability to choose to focus your life on the truly important things. Someone might make a lot more money in their life time, but in return be burdened by meetings, appointments, and obligations – this is not wealth.  Wealth is the flexibility to be involved in the things that really matter in life.

Though I might not have as much as others in the bank, I feel like the richest man in the world because I am surrounded by a family that loves me, and I’m involved in a ministry that helps people.

Post written by Craig Ford.

How have you learned to be content?  How do you define wealth?  What are some of your greatest treasures?

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Wealth And Contentment: Two Peas In A Pod

Recently, I have been noticing an interesting relationship between what is necessary for physical fitness and for financial fitness.  This is not to say that everyone who is physically fit is also financially fit, but those who have overcome weight struggles have the proven skills necessary to manage their finances.  Also, those who manage their finances well have the qualities necessary for physical fitness.  Do you struggle with both fitness and finances?  Here is the good news - you only need to learn one set of skills that will apply to both disciplines.

Here are the qualities necessary for both physical fitness and financial fitness

1.  Motivation

I have a friend who will be on an upcoming season of The Biggest Loser.  He wrote on his Facebook wall,“the mental part of this is the hardest and your words are helping so much.”

The mental part?  I thought weight loss was about diet and exercise.  But, there is a mental battle necessary to motivate yourself into action.  Most people who are overweight know they should lose weight.  Most people in financial debt know they should get out of debt.  The problem often is the motivation is missing.  Something will eventually spark that passion.  The motivation might come in response to some external factor like a warning message from a doctor or a letter from a debt collector.  The motivation might also come from an internal factor where you finally get sick and tired of wishing and you are finally ready to act.

If you want to get out of debt or to improve your financial situation, you will need motivation.  If you want to lose weight or to get in better physical shape, you will need motivation.

Free yourself, like a gazelle from the hand of the hunter, like a bird from the snare of the fowler. (Proverbs 6:5 NIV)

2.  Self-discipline

Self discipline is the ability to do what you know is right.

A person who is financially fit will avoid expenditures that will damage their overall financial situation.  They have an overall sense of their financial direction and they stop spending in areas they know are a burden on their budget.  They forgo wasteful activities and purchases by avoiding them completely or by finding frugal alternatives that fit within their income.

A person who is physically fit will avoid foods that damage their fitness plan.  They have a sense of what eating habits are destructive to their fitness plan.  This might be the time during a day when you eat more than you should, or it might be the type of food that contains little nutritious value.  Those who are self-disciplined have identified those problem areas and avoid them completely or establish a plan for consuming appropriate proportions.

If you want to get out of debt or to improve your financial situation you will need self-discipline.  If you want to lose weight or to get in better physical shape you will need self-discipline.

You are all sons of the light and sons of the day. We do not belong to the night or to the darkness. So then, let us not be like others, who are asleep, but let us be alert and self-controlled. (1 Thessalonians 5:5-6 NIV)

3.  The Ability to Say ‘No’

We are full of cravings.  Those cravings could be for physical “stuff”.  Those cravings could be for food.  A person who is fit in both senses has to learn how to say ‘no’ to those cravings. One who lacks the ability to say ‘no’ purchases whatever they want – regardless of the financial cost.  One who lacks the ability say ‘no’ eats whatever they want – regardless of the nutritional value.

For everything in the world—the cravings of sinful man, the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has and does—comes not from the Father but from the world. (1 John 2:16 NIV)

4.  The Ability to Prioritize

Related to the ability to say ‘no’ is the ability to say ‘yes’.  This is commonly called prioritizing.  People who experience financial peace have determined what spending takes priority.  This way they do not spend money they do not have.  Their lives are not just about sacrifice, but they are defined by the ability to yes to the right spending choices (typically as determined by a budget or spending plan).

People who are physically fit also have the ability to say ‘yes’ to the right activities.  They prioritize in both their eating and exercising.  This priority may be seen in passing over a certain food in order to eat something else at a later point.  Rather than sleeping in, they place a priority on exercise.

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. (Matthew 6:33 NIV)

5.  Allocate Time and Energy

People often get into trouble when they start believing a problem can be solved without any effort or sacrifice.  Those looking to get rich quick often find themselves defrauded.  Those wanting to lose weight without diet or exercise find that they have spent a lot of money on different programs that simply do not work.

The truth is that both financial and physical fitness require time and energy.  Financially, you will need to spend time budgeting, reading, calling, and filling out paper work.  Physically, you will need to spend time exercising and learning about fitness.

If you are not willing to dedicate any time or energy to physical fitness, your plan will fail.  If you are not willing to dedicate any time or energy to financial fitness, your plan will fail.

If a man is lazy, the rafters sag; if his hands are idle, the house leaks. (Ecclesiastes 10:18 NIV)

Why not apply these principles to help improve your physical fitness, financial fitness, or both?

In what other ways are physical fitness and financial fitness similar?  How do you motivate yourself?

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Five Qualities Necessary For Both Financial Fitness and Physical Fitness

“Money related issues in marriage can draw a husband and wife closer together.”

Following this phrase a laugh typically ensues.  People think someone is obviously trying to humor them by speaking such ridiculous words.  Money brings about intimacy in marriage?  I want to plead with you to accept this premise – all married couples have the potential to a healthy and intimate financial relationship.

Here are some of the common complaints about money in marriage: “My husband and I are never on the same page with money.” “My wife wants to tithe, but I don’t think we can afford it.” “My husband keeps doing business deals that cost our family a lot of money.” “My wife keeps buying things for our kids even though we cannot afford it.”  Not surprisingly, money fights are one of the leading causes of divorce.  I believe financial tension in relationships can be improved if not alleviated if couples commit themselves to following these ten suggestions on how to improve the financial intimacy in their marriage.

Ten ways to improve your financial intimacy in marriage

1.     Pray for guidance and wisdom:

Few couples invite God into their financial lives.  I think God has some amazing things he can do with our finances if we allow him to enter into the process.  Marriage is always a joint relationship between husband, wife, and God.

In your prayers focus on the following:

Pray that God would allow you to put the marriage above any individual concerns.  Ask God to guide you in how he wants the funds earned, used, and distributed.  Request a double portion of humility so you can be prepared to accept God’s guidance.  Plead with God to give you the necessary strength to release control of your money and give God control.

If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. (James1:5 NIV)

2.     Be partners

Marriage is an amalgamation of all the pieces of life.  The husband and the wife lose their individual identity and become one.  “I” is dropped from the vocabulary and replaced with “We.” The married couple no longer uses “my”, but “our”.  This includes finances.  Every dollar brought into the home is a dollar that belongs to the home.  Every dollar that goes out the door is a dollar that the household spent.  Erase all notions of individual finances.  Forget about who bought what.  It doesn’t matter who first signed for the loan.  From now on we are in this financial situation together.  We have an equal responsibility and an equal opportunity.

For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. (Genesis 2:24 NIV)

3.     Define Goals

Goal setting is a form of practical dreaming – and who doesn’t like to dream about what the future could be?  This goal setting is not just about finances, but it is about all things in life.  Where do you want to be?  What do you want to be doing?  What do you want people to say about your life accomplishments?  Goal setting is where a husband and wife look at each other and say, “Where do we want to be in 5 years? In 10 years? In 15 years?”  Husband and wife then look at the financial implications of those goals they have jointly set. If a husband and a wife have separate goals it will be nearly impossible to have financial intimacy in marriage.

Jesus knew their thoughts and said to them, “Every kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and every city or household divided against itself will not stand. (Matthew12:25 NIV)

4.     Combine it

Since there is a union between husband and wife it is essential that couples combine bank accounts and all other financial items.  It is difficult, but possible, to function financially with separate bank accounts.  However, what do you seek for in your marriage?  To ‘function’ or to thrive?  I do not believe a marriage can thrive until there is intimacy on all levels.  This involves combining all financial resources.

It doesn’t matter who earns it. Some couples think that the one who earns the money spends the money or dictates how it ought to be spent.  Instead, you should respect your unique contributions to the home.  Our family has made the decision that my wife will stay home and raise our children.  She is well educated and easily marketable in the professional world, but we made a choice, and we each make a contribution to the decisions we made.

The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. (1 Corinthians 7:4 NIV) *

* While this passage speaks of the physical relationship between husband and wife the principle of joint ownership applies.  What previously belonged to the wife/husband (his and her body) is now shared with the spouse as he is now a joint-owner of his/her body.

5.     Distribute Responsibilities:

Money management takes time, energy, knowledge, and wisdom.  One of the common complaints about the modern family is the burden of so many responsibilities and commitments.  This makes its way into the home as couples are forced to decide who will take care of the different tasks related to personal finances.

Here is what I suggest:

1. Take out a blank piece of paper (or open a Word document on your computer) and list all of the the jobs related to personal finances.  This list might include things like balancing the check book, transferring funds, paying bills, researching retirement options, making investment decisions …
2. Make a copy of that list.  Both spouses should write on of the following phrases by each tasks:    (a) I enjoy doing that, (b) I am willing to do that, (c) Blahh. Please don’t make me do that.
3. Compare your lists.  Assign responsibilities first according to the task you each enjoy.  Next, assign responsibilities by rotating every other task in the “willing to do that” list.  Then finally, if both of you are “blahh” for the same task, consider (a) outsourcing it if possible, (b) splitting the responsibility50/50 , or (c) assigning the task to one partner and the other will assume another household responsibility that you both rate as ‘blahh’.

Proverbs 31:10-31 outlines the responsibilities assumed by the wife of noble character.

6.     Budget Jointly and Meet Regularly:

When you have defined your goals you now have a broad or general direction that you would like to follow in your lives.  In addition, you have figured out the financial implications of those goals.  Now your job is to apply those long term goals to the short term – this month’s budget.  If you have first agreed on your long term goals your dollars should more easily fall into a natural pattern for short term usage.  The budget represents the small goals you meet along the way to achieving your ultimate goals.

Once the budget is set it is important that you track your progress.  The best way is to meet together regularly.  Imagine if Junior got sick and I bought a bunch of medication.  My spouse needs to know that happened because we may need to adjust another budget item to make the budget work.

Here is what my wife and I do. Every Monday night is budget night.  After the kids go to bed we sit down at the dinning room table together.  We take all the receipts we collected from the previous week.  She reads them and I type them into our budget program.  One of us could do the job, but as she reads and I type, we are both aware of all the week’s expenditures.  We then take a quick look over the budget to be sure the dollars we allocated to each category still seems sufficient.  If we have overspent on a category we take the money from somewhere else in the budget.  The meeting shouldn’t take any more than 15 – 20 min per week.

However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:33 NIV)

7.     Work at Removing Financial pressure:

Too many money discussions in marriage happen in high-stress situations.  Chuck Bentley at Crown Financial Ministries frequently talks about creating financial margin.  Where there is margin, stress is removed from the situation.  Imagine this scenario: you are on your way to work on a day that every second counts because you didn’t leave a spare moment anywhere on your agenda.  Then you end up getting stuck in traffic.  Every moment is torturous because you have no margin, no space to delay.  I guarantee that if you made that same drive on a Saturday morning visit to see friends you would not be nearly as stressed.  You need to take away the pressure that every financial decision could break you. This must be done by paying off debt and saving for emergencies.  Once you have taken care of those financial pressures you will find that all your financial discussions are suddenly so much easier because there is now space to breathe and even room for error.

The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is servant to the lender. (Proverbs 22:7 NIV)

8.     Agree on Some Guiding Principles:

You should only need to make some decisions in your marriage once.  Unfortunately, many couples have not put those boundaries in place so when it comes to making financial decisions they are forced to keep re-addressing the same issues.

Here are some examples of guidelines you might have: We will give a least 10% of our income to our local church or other charities.  We will save 15% of every paycheck towards retirement.  We will buy things with cash and will not borrow.  We will always make a car payment to ourselves.  We always put down at least 25% when buying a home.  The list could continue.  The point is when you set your goals some decisions only need to be made once and then you budget according to these guidelines.

Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed. (Proverbs 16:3 NIV)

9.     Seek outside help:

Sometimes a third party can be an invaluable resource.  Couples who find themselves at an impasse often just need someone to help them hear what the other spouse is saying. When communication in marriage has failed, find a church counselor or minister who can guide you back on track.  This does not need to be a costly endeavor as many churches have resources available to offer you assistance free of charge.

Perhaps you need a different type of outside help.  Ask a friend or parent to watch the kids for an evening or day so you and your spouse can discuss these issues without the children distracting you.

Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed. (Proverbs 15:22 NIV)

10.     Put the needs of your spouse above your own.

Often our financial discussions are a sign of our immaturity and our carnal self.  We hunger and lust for things.  We desire those things even above the welfare of our marriage.  Give up the insignificant things of life so that you can gain the greater reward of a unified marriage.

Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. (Philippians 2:4 NIV)

Which of these have been most helpful in your relationship?  Is there something I neglected to mention that you think would be a valuable suggestion for couples?

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Ten Ways To Improve Financial Intimacy In Marriage

For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not sit down first and count the cost, whether he may have enough to finish it; lest perhaps, after he has laid the foundation and is not able to finish, all those seeing begin to mock him, saying, This man began to build and was not able to finish. Luke 14:28-30

Earlier this week I wrote a post about how important it is to plan ahead, to save for the things you need to buy, and how much more satisfaction you’ll get when you do that. Today’s verse speaks to the importance of counting the costs of the things we buy, and planning ahead for those costs.

The verse says, “which of you intending to build a tower, does not sit down first and count the cost..”.   We could easily change that verse to apply to today saying something like, “which of you, intending to buy a car, does not sit down first and count the cost”?

So many people just approach their finances passively, allowing things to happen to them.  Instead of planning ahead, saving up for a car and being ready when the time comes to buy a new one, instead they drive their old car until it completely dies, and then when the time comes they buy an expensive brand new car (more than they can afford), financed at a high rate of interest.    They didn’t count the cost, and now they’ll paythe price.

B e active with your finances, count the costs, plan ahead, and you’ll be much better off when the time comes to buy the things you need.

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Personal Finance Bible Verse Of The Day: Count The Cost And Plan Ahead

Let each one do just as he has resolved in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. 2 Corinthians 9:7

This verse in 2 Corinthians tells us that God loves a cheerful giver. God wants us to give to our church, and to others freely so that we might experience the true joy of giving, and sharing with those around us.

I truly believe that not only does God love a cheerful giver, but that the act of giving will also make you more cheerful! When you give you experience the true joy of knowing you’ve made a positive impact on someone’s life, and you acknowledge that there is something more important out there than money or material things. Hording everything you earn won’t make you happy. True happiness comes through knowing Jesus Christ, and through living more like him – in an unselfish, caring and loving manner.

So next time you’re thinking about whether or not you should give, remember. Giving makes you happier, and makes you a more un-selfish and caring person. Food for thought.

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Personal Finance Bible Verse Of The Day: God Loves A Cheerful Giver

It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay – Ecclesiastes 5:5

In this day and age it seems to have become more and more common for people to live above their means, and to use credit and debt to increase their lifestyle. Instead of saving up for things and paying cash, they buy today and pay the consequences tomorrow. In fact, many people buy things knowing full well that they won’t be able to pay, or that they will most likely will default.

This verse speaks to me about the importance of living up to your obligations. Whether it is continuing to pay the mortgage on a house that you’re underwater in (because you signed that contract saying you would pay), or paying off the credit card debt you racked up on your last vacation, it is important to live up to the promises that you’ve made to others.

Have the integrity to follow through on what you’ve said you would do. If you know you aren’t able to afford something, it is better that you never take out the loan in the first place. Don’t fall vicitim to the mentality that it’s ok to wrack up debt, and then not pay.

Are there times that you wished you had heeded this advice, and not have taken out a loan you shouldn’t have? What did you learn from that experience? Tell us about it in the comments!

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Personal Finance Bible Verse Of The Day: Not Paying Your Debts

I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’ Acts 20:35

Giving of ourselves, our time and our money is a great way to change the lives of others, and for us to change our own lives and to become more unselfish people.

Have you ever been excited to give something to someone?   Did you realize through that experience just how good it feels to give?

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Personal Finance Bible Verse Of The Day: More Blessed To Give

The wise have wealth and luxury, but fools spend whatever they get. Proverbs 21:20

The verse is short and sweet – but gets right to the heart of the matter. Those who are wise with their money, plan ahead and save for a rainy day will have wealth and luxury. Those who are foolish spend everything they earn for the pleasures of today, and end up not prospering in the end.

Which one are you?

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Personal Finance Bible Verse Of The Day: Fools Spend

Better is the poor who walks in his integrity, than he who is perverse in his ways, and he is rich. Proverbs 28:6

Sometimes we are presented with opportunities to make money  in ways that aren’t completely legitimate.  It could be anything from returning a product to a store where it wasn’t purchased,  to stealing something that isn’t ours and selling it.  This verse talks of how important it is to have integrity, and how if you don’t have integrity, having a fortune doesn’t really matter.

The book “The Millionaire Mind” found that having integrity may also be an important part of being successful.  A survey of millionaires found that a majority of them believed having integrity was crucial in their success.  In fact to them it was one of the more important things.

So, while being poor with integrity may be better than being rich without it,  having integrity can help lead you towards success.  Something to think about.

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Personal Finance Bible Verse Of The Day: Integrity

Times Are Tough, And So Is Finding A New Job

We’re living in a down economy and thousands of people have lost their jobs. Budgets are tight! A lot of people are struggling to make ends meet, and they’re having to find new ways to make money.

While listening to the radio this morning on my way to work I listened to a news piece about moms in one city who had lost jobs, or were having to find new sources of income to help the family stay afloat and avoid foreclosure.

One of them was entrepreneurial and had started her own business baking cookies.  She was selling them to family, friends and others via word of mouth. She wasn’t making a ton, but she was making enough to keep them from going under.

Then there were those on the other end of the spectrum, the women who were doing things that they normally probably wouldn’t have, but now were deciding that they had no alternative.  Several of the ladies had turned to jobs as strippers just to make ends meet. They justified it by saying that they had been forced to do this because their financial situation was tenuous at best, and without the income they would have lost their homes.  There just weren’t any other jobs available!

Listening to the piece really got me thinking. What would I do if times were tough?  What jobs would I do if we were coming up short and needed to make our mortgage payment?  What jobs would I not lower myself to do? Or is avoiding a financial catastrophe more important than my pride?

What Does The Bible Say?

On the one hand I’m reminded of the bible verse that tells us that we need to take care of our families.

If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.  1 Timothy 5:8

We need to take care of our families, and provide for them.   This means doing the hard work that it takes to make ends meet.  That may even mean taking some odd jobs that we normally wouldn’t in order to pay the bills.   Maybe it’s taking a paper route like my family did when I was younger.  It may be teaching english classes at a local community center, or being a janitor  on the weekends.  Whatever it is, there are always places that you can find some kind of work, even if it is just temporary.   Remember, if you work hard, God tells us that our needs will be met.

Those who work hard have all their needs met, but the lazy are always left craving for what they need.  Proverbs 13:4

Are there jobs that we shouldn’t do, or things we shouldn’t do for money, even if we’re in tough circumstances?  I think so, I think we need to hold ourselves to a high moral standard, and not do anything that would compromise our beliefs.   We need to stand strong in our faith, and God will be with us.

Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.  James 1:12

For me that would mean I wouldn’t take any job that I couldn’t do without having a clean conscience.  There are far too many jobs out there, even in these tough times, to be doing something I can’t feel good about.

How About You?

If you were strapped for cash, how far would you go to make ends meet?  What kinds of jobs would you take (or have you taken), and what kinds of jobs would you NOT do?  Do you think there is a line that shouldn’t be  crossed, or is providing for your family just too important?  Have you ever been tempted to do something that was against your conscience because you needed money?

Let us know your thoughts in the comments!

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If You Were Strapped For Cash, How Far Would You Go To Make Money?